Serial blasts in Delhi

I had a lot to write about this afternoon-- stuff I thought was important. Then, just as I was sitting down at my desk to write, my grandmother called. She knew I had been out most of the day and was panicking. Bomb blasts in 3 major markets in New Delhi this afternoon-- 2 that I frequent. Everyone is still n... different news channels have completely different reports of number of blasts and number of casualties. But there seem to have been at least 5 blasts, killing at least 18 people. Now, just keeping one's fingers crossed and praying that neither of those numbers goes up.

Each time one of these things happen, the world turns upside down for a while. Sent out about 30 phone messages... asking after people and their families, telling people who didn't yet know about the blasts to stay home and take care. But other than that, felt helpless. What can you do? What can I do? Except wait and watch?

Nothing I wanted to write about before this news feels important anymore. Or... it does. But I don't want to write about it. Not today, not now. Maybe later. Writing about other things, as if nothing happened today, feels like a sacrilege. Is this why we honor such mishaps moments of silence... by stopping for a moment, by letting this be the most important thing that happened even if just for that moment?

I finally got too depressed watching the news over and over so swtiched to some music thingy Mom wants to watch. What's the point of following this minute-by-minute? And yet, i feel guilty for not doing so. I feel guilty continuing with work or doing anything else right now... I'm more ok sitting around in a daze because that, in some weird way, feels like a moment of mourning. I need to mourn.

Maybe tomorrow I'll go back to telling you the stories I hoped to tell today. Maybe tomorrow I'll pretend life is back to normal. But I hope I don't forget the moments during which it isn't normal... and the fact that it will never again be normal for at least 18 families. My heart goes out to you all, and although I don't know you, I am sending you lots of love, prayers, and positive energy. Let's hold together...