It's been a long time since i wrote anything. Not just on the blog I mean... I mean wrote, in general. For reasons that some of you know well, I am spending too much time writing about writing these days... too little time actually writing!

It isn't for want of things to write about. It is partially because some of the things i would write about might invade the privacy of others; a lot that's on my mind right now has so much to do with other people in my life that it cannot go up here. And partially because I don't want all of you to know about some of the other things going on in my life. Argh, sometimes, I wish i had kept the blog anonymous, but then again, if i did that, how would I stay in touch with all the people who do know me?

I've typed two LONG emails today. Why do i write so much when i sit down to write? It's exhausting for me, and I am sure it's exhausting for others too. Old habits die hard.

Certain things that have happened in the last... say, 2 weeks... have really made me think about the ways in which my life has changed and grown over these last 4-5 years. Sometimes, I am blown away by my own journey through so many lands, so many cultures... my interactions with so many people. I am amazed at everthing and everyone I carry in my heart. I had an interesting conversation with someone at work a few days ago, where she felt strongly that the more people you try to stay in touch with and be connected to, the harder it is to make space for new people... she felt that we each have a limited amount of love and energy to offer, and it gets distributed depending on how many people we choose to give it to. I've thought about that, but i am pretty sure i disagree. My life tells me a different story. With each new place I have travelled to, with each new person I have loved, I feel my cpacity for love growing rather than diminishing. Sure, I don't have te energy to keep up with everyone-- I am out of touch with too many people from Argentina, from Mexico, from SUA, even from right here in Delhi. But I don't feel out of touch. I know I could pick up the phone tomorrow, and it would be like we had just talked. We would have a lot to tell in terms of filling each other in on news, but i don't think we'd feel for a moment that we havent talked in months. I'm not sure how that has happened, but I am glad it has. It keeps me from getting lonely. I feel lucky to have so many SUCH beautiful people in my life.

I could ramble forever once you get me started on this topic, but I think I'll goeat dinner now. I have an especially challenging workshop session early tomorrow morning, so I want my full night's rest! Hope to find time for some more meaningful writing/ blogging this weekend.