Death and life

Yesterday was my grandfather's death anniversary. Well, it was 11 months since his death, and for some reason that I'm not entirely sure of, we commemorate the 11th month more than the first year of death. So I spent last evening in the Gurudwara for the ceremony.

It was strange, surreal almost. I don't think it's hit home even now; I was so far away when he died that I still haven't fully understood that he did die. Makes me think of Mauro and his insistence about the importance of closing circles... and about what happens when you can't close them.

But I was also struck by how, when one chapter closes, another opens. With Nana's death, we closed a chapter of our lives with a huge part of the extended family... seeing them yesterday simply served to underline that for me. But in the process we also discovered the family of his younger brother, whom we hadn't spoken with or met with in years. Now, they are the ones who stay with us during such moments, who invite us home for lunch, who are the extended family. Life's funny.

I want to do a Mexican style Dia de los Muertos ceremony this year. I'm tired of a culture that only mourns death; I want to start celebrating it as a part of celebrating that life... the Central Americans sure got that right.